The mass exodus nobody is measuring (yet)
last month I watched as nearly 100+ people confided in me about their dating woes on Instagram.
I’d posted a question sticker on my Instagram Stories to understand how people are dating, meeting others, and if anyone is still leaving their house.
but the replies I got were something else entirely:
then last week, Bumble announced that they’re laying off 30% of their global staff. The founder noted that dating apps are “at an inflection point”.
no shit!!!!!
but it’s not just dating apps standing at the edge of a cliff.
it’s every app that’s turned us into algorithmic lab rats over the last 15+ years.
trust has left the building
I’m a marketer, and I’ve been watching this car crash in slow motion. I’ve even made videos about it here, here, and here where I called the future algorithm-free.
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people are exhausted. they’re done.
Northwestern researchers even uncovered that once you understand how the algorithms work, they exhaust you more. every marketer and social media manager I know is a fried egg at this point.
for as long as smartphones have been around, our swipes have been tracked, our pauses have been analyzed, and our interactions have been weaponized to keep us addicted.
and now, we’re the first generation to not only experience this digital manipulation, but understand it - in real time.
so we’re doing something about it.
we the people are consolidating
at the heart of social media is the desire to stay connected to one another, which is a human need.
it’s also become a way for people to express their free speech.
so instead of leaving social as we know it entirely, people are building new digital escape hatches.
one of those escape hatches is Discord, which has exploded with 30% growth in 15 months.
and those small, invite-only servers feel like actual friend groups, consistent with Dunbar’s 15-person ‘sympathy group’ layer.
one creator I’ve talked to has even created an entire paid Discord community off of TikTok Lives (it’s in the finance space - happy to share the name if you DM me :))
yet this exodus spreads beyond Discord and off of algorithm-centric platforms.
Slack and WhatsApp have also become popular 5-9 “untraditional” community hangouts now.
users are essentially abandoning “group” or “group chat” functionality baked into the platforms (Facebook Groups, group DMs, etc.) in favor of more neutral, widely used apps (and yes, these are not small platforms either - one is even owned my Meta!)
all of this checks out. people are realizing, especially in a post-COVID world, that they WANT to be social with human-curated content…just not what Big Tech has called “social media”.
but social media apps (and the government) still need you
naturally, Zuck sees this exodus. why else would Instagram and WhatsApp desperately push “private” group chats? they need to keep people confined in their walled gardens.
even TikTok announced yesterday that in light of their prospective ban (which has been the song that never ends in the United States) that they’ll be launching their own version of the app called M - for United States users only.
and because it’s been 15 years of increasing distrust, people are conditioned to seeing the writing on the wall.
the government (with Truth Social, X/Elon, and now this debacle with TikTok) and Big Tech are all after our data, our interests, and our attention.
so users are scattering to find the next place where we feel like we can belong without sacrificing our sanity, our privacy, and our safety.
and many of those next places just happen to be decentralized spaces where no big billionaire or country can “own” us.
thinking critically about what this means for you
I’m a marketer who works with brands, and I already know what most brands are going to *think* they should do.
let’s be clear: do NOT go to to create a Substack or a new Discord server right now.
this is a drawing board moment. you want to be a trusted confidante and curator who doesn’t need to be followed.
how can you help save YOUR PEOPLE from algorithms and doomscrolling?
no, really - how can you become an asset and not another barrier?
(don’t make them sign up for another email newsletter!!! you’re on their side)
what does it mean now to cultivate a real community because you want to, not because your CEO says you need to be on Substack because they heard it’s the “next big thing”?
marketers have long been seen as manipulators, but at our core, we serve needs.
take a step back and think about how your brand can fill one.
not something you want to do on your own? then figure out creators you want to align with who have their own trusted communities.
this is a massive step toward privacy and consolidation for users. don’t fuck this up.
thanks for taking the time to read!
some things I’m up to:
building my Future-Proof workshop for C-suite/brand teams who want to stay ahead (DM me if you’re interested - more info coming soon!)
running my own private Slack community for female founders who want to show up on social
hosting a few incredible workshops with Bonfire in Burgundy, France in September for those who feel creatively burned out (come join us and hit the reset button!)